From the Questions to the Questioner
Read slowly, aloud; about twelve minutes.
Before you begin. This is a light, reflective practice. If questions about death or punishment frighten you deeply, or you have obsessive doubts that grow when attended to, practise with a clinician. If you are prone to feeling unreal, keep your eyes half open. Sit in a safe place; never practise while driving.
How to return at any moment. Press your feet down, say "I am here," count from one to five and open your eyes.
Sit, and let the breath slow. Let the eyes close.
Let your large questions come, the ones that wake you at night. One after another, as the king's did. What happens at the end? Why this? Why me? What is it all for? Let them come. You need not answer any of them.
Breathe out.
Hold each question for a moment as a bubble in awareness. Watch it rise. Watch it float. Do not answer it. Let the next one come.
Notice that each question appears in awareness, and seems as real as it feels. Notice that every answer you imagine appears there too, and seems real while it lasts.
Now turn, gently, from the questions to the one who is asking. Not what, but who. Who is it that holds all these questions?
You do not need a word for it. Notice only that it is here, and that it is not one of the questions.
Let the questions settle, the way a city built in imagination can be let go of, without loss. Let them rest, like children's houses of mud left on the shore.
Rest as the one who watches. It does not set. It does not rise. It is simply here.
(Silence: one minute.)
One. Choose one question to carry, not as a worry but as an inquiry. Hold it lightly.
Two. Feel your body on the seat, solid and present.
Three. Feel your feet on the floor.
Four. Hear the room. Take a full breath.
Five. Open your eyes, fully alert.
Say your name, the day and where you are. Name three things you can see. If any question feels heavier than before, write it down and leave it on the page for today.