The One Born of a Wish
Read slowly, aloud; about fifteen minutes. Best done with a clinician present the first time.
Before you begin. This is an inner-dialogue practice and can bring up strong feeling. Do not use it if you are having thoughts of ending your life or of harming yourself; speak to a clinician or a crisis line first. Do not practise it alone if you have a dissociative disorder or a psychotic illness. Never practise while driving or in or near water. Keep a notebook nearby.
How to return at any moment. Open your eyes, press your feet into the floor, name five things you can see, and take three full breaths.
Sit comfortably. Let the eyes close. Let the breath slow.
Imagine a wide, quiet sky inside you. You are seated in it, steady, at ease.
Notice that someone is nearby. Not frightening: a presence that has waited a long time and carries a longing. You may have passed it by before. This time, turn towards it.
Look at it gently. Then ask, silently or aloud, the four questions. Who are you? Whose are you? Where do you live? What do you want of me?
Wait. Let it answer in its own time, in words or images or a feeling in the body.
Ask it how it was born. Which thought, which need, long ago, made it? Perhaps a question like the Brāhmaṇa's: can there be someone for me? Let it tell you.
Now let it tell you about the burning. Where does comfort feel like thorns? What beauty makes it weep? Listen. Do not correct it. Do not hurry it. Only hear.
Breathe out.
Ask: What are you growing tired of? And: What do you want now, instead of the old wish?
Ask together whose will it has been serving. Let the answer come.
Agree on one thing it may rest from. Thank it, simply, for carrying what it has carried.
(Silence: one to two minutes.)
Now let the figure go back to its dwelling, knowing it can be visited again.
Take three fuller breaths. Feel the weight of your body on the seat, your feet on the floor.
I will count from one to five. One: the breath is full. Two: hands and feet are warm. Three: the sounds of the room return. Four: a deep breath in, shoulders roll once. Five: eyes open, here, now, fully alert.
Say your name, the day and the place. Write down, in a few words, what the figure wanted. If any feeling remains strong, do not sit with it alone: talk to someone you trust or to your clinician today.